The Opening Of Misty Beethoven






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Widely considered to be the greatest adult film of all time, Radley Metzger's "The Opening of Misty Beethoven" is the apex of porno chic! It won best picture, director, actor, editing and screenplay at the Erotic Film Awards that year and is listed in the XRCO Hall of Fame and AVN Top 500.

In his erotic retelling of George Bernard Shaw's classic play Pygmalion, master director Radley Metzger transplants the action to 1970's New York, Rome, and Paris. We follow noted sexologist Dr. Seymour Love (Jamie Gillis) as he sets himself the challenge of transforming lowly streetwalker Misty Beethoven (Constance Money) into the world's greatest lover. With the help of his beautiful friend Geraldine (Jacqueline Beudant), Love devises an erotic training program with the goal of seeing Misty crowned "Goldenrod Girl" at famed publisher Lawrence Layman's next wild party. Along the way, Misty refines her technique by seducing an impotent artist, bringing three uniformed butlers to climax simultaneously, and dallying with a rainbow-ceramic sex toy in one of the most arousing films ever created.

Filmed in 3 countries on 2 continents with many of the most famous golden-age actors (including Gloria Leonard, Ras Kean, Casey Donovan and Terri Hall), featuring a witty and intelligent screenplay, and shot by award-winning cinematographer Paul Glickman, Misty Beethoven is the golden standard by which all other adult films have been measured.
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Editor's Review

Here it is, the Holy Grail of adult cinema, the finest porn film ever made both by critical consensus as from a fan's point of view. Director Radley Metzger of course had a solid background in mainstream movie-making with tasteful titillation along the lines of CAMILLE 2000 and THERESE AND ISABELLE to his credit before taking the plunge into explicit territory with a mere five high class productions. SCORE and THE PUNISHMENT OF ANNE, both of which contain a little bit of hardcore footage, don't really count as they're borderline cases.

THE OPENING OF MISTY BEETHOVEN rests proudly in the middle of this fabulous five-some, following THE PRIVATE AFTERNOONS OF PAMELA MANN and NAKED CAME THE STRANGER yet preceding BARBARA BROADCAST and MARASCHINO CHERRY. It has charm, style, wit and grace, qualities not usually associated with pornography. Every aspect of production has been handled with the utmost care, from its sumptuous cinematography (as good as any seen in big studio movies from the same period) to its lively soundtrack by rock group Elephant's Memory. Unlike other well-produced adult fare though, this one also has all the scorching sex to cement its legendary reputation for generations to come. This is the kind of adult film that should sway even the most ardent of naysayers, unless the very thought of explicit eroticism repels them. It was made by and for intelligent people who can also appreciate a good dirty joke.

Borrowing its plot from Shaw's PYGMALION, MISTY finds noted sexologist Dr. Seymour Love (porn's bad boy Jamie Gillis cast against type and delivering a career performance) cruising the streets of Paris and running into a coarse streetwalker by name of Misty – formerly Dolores – Beethoven, played to perfection by the all too rarely seen Constance Money who made only a handful of flicks. Never one to resist a challenge and fired up because of a wager with fellow jet-setter Geraldine (one time performer Jaqueline Beudant), Seymour invites the girl to come along to his mansion in the States where he will groom her to become the next Goldenrod Girl of naughty magazine publishing tycoon Lawrence Lehman (handsome Ras Kean, star of Armand Weston's brilliant EXPOSE ME, LOVELY), a title only bestowed on women who're revered the world over for their exceptional beauty, sensuality and lovemaking skills. On a crash course, Misty's put through her sexual paces, gaining insight and technique as she's presented with a number of "difficult" cases for seduction. All the while, she is falling in love with her mentor who doesn't (or pretends not to) notice… It is absolutely impossible to over praise this film. While other adult movies made since may eclipse it in certain areas, there has yet to be made another one that surpasses it in all aspects. The sheer brilliance of the leads is ably supported by a cast filled to the brim with fan favorites, most of whom deliver equally fine performances vertically as well as horizontally. Terri Hall (the leading lady from Gerard Damiano's STORY OF JOANNA) shines as ballerina Tanya who does a sweltering Sapphic number on beautiful Beudant. Gay porn icon Casey Donovan (BOYS IN THE SAND) plays the effeminate gallery owner who finds himself at Misty's mercy and later supplied the buttocks for the Ras Kean rectal excavation portion of a three-way involving Misty and Gloria Leonard, the latter then at the start of what was to become a most distinguished career in the adult field. Mary Stuart (who had played the lead in Shaun Costello's extraordinary THE PASSIONS OF CAROL) and Jenny Baxter (from Costello's TRAVAILS OF JUNE) are stewardesses on a most peculiar airline in a sequence characteristic of the type of off the wall humor Metzger excelled at.

-Review courtesy of DirtyMovieDevotee

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